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The SelfWork Podcast

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The SelfWork Podcast

Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD

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Depression, anxiety, and personal emotional struggles, are hard to manage on their own. You can feel very lonely in that battle. And so many people either can’t or won’t try therapy. It’s too weird, it’s too expensive, or you’re nervous about trying it. SelfWork can help you begin that healing, or be an addition to the work you’re already doing, as I offer compassionate common-sense directions, ideas and goals toward the changes you want to make. I’ve been a psychologist for over 25 years; a ...
 
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We have a huge treat for you today, and her name is Kimberly Quinlan. She specializes in anxiety disorders, obsessive compulsive disorder, eating disorders, and body focused, repetitive behaviors.. She also provides one-on-one treatment, and offers free online courses at the school she founded, The CBT School. . And I really recommend that any of y…
 
I’m so delighted to be back with you in 2022! Happy New Year to all of you as we continue to work for you here on the podcast! We are growing by leaps and bounds so a huge thank you to all of you who’ve been sharing and telling your friends about your experience. Please subscribe wherever you listen and my immense gratitude to any of you who’ve lef…
 
Here's our last Second Time Around until we're back in the saddle in a few days! And we're so looking forward to what's ahead in 2022! What's a trauma bond? How does it form? Why is it important for that dynamic to have its own label or name? Trauma bonding happens when trust is highly manipulated; when commitment and trying to make a relationship …
 
Hello and welcome again to SelfWork! We've got one more week until we're back live! But I've chosen some of the most popular episodes to listen to a second time around! And of course, today's episode is one very close to my heart. What’s the difference, or is there one, between Perfectly Hidden Depression and what’s called high-functioning depressi…
 
Starting off in a new year, knowing it'll be filled with both challenge and celebration, it helps to think you have a solid partnership in your life. But if you have conflict or estrangement or alienation within your relationship, facing a new year can be more than daunting and certainly very lonely. Today we’re going to focus on what can cause the…
 
Here we are on the cusp of 2022! And many of you will be trying once again to have a New Years resolution. I'm not a huge fan of those but building self-confidence would certainly be a worthy one! In this second time around for this episode, as my team and I take a break during the holidays, I'll tell the story again about a patient who'd begun to …
 
This is our second "Second Time Around" SelfWork episode as the team takes the holidays off (and I work on Book #2!) I loved this series on the most recent research on depression and what it indicates are the diverse potential sources or "reasons" for someone to experience depression. These episodes were first recorded in 2019 so the information wa…
 
This is our first "Second Time Around" SelfWork episode as we take the holidays off (and I work on Book #2!) I loved this series on the most recent research on depression and what it indicates are the diverse potential sources or "reasons" for someone to experience depression. This was first recorded in 2019 so the information was the newest I coul…
 
Today, I wanted to take the time before 2021 ends to answer a few more or your email questions. Your questions are so good, it’s hard not to answer them all! Today’s subjects are enmeshment, developing feelings for your therapist, maternal sexual abuse, and getting multiple forms of therapy at once – all great topics in and of themselves. So, lots …
 
Synergy is a strange and phenomenal thing. Like many people around the world, I watched in horror as the US military withdrew from Afghanistan, seeing the frenetic despair of those trying to get out, handing babies over to troops, risking their lives to get to freedom - It was raw fear happening right before your eyes - no matter what your politica…
 
Perhaps one of the most complex concepts in mental health is the concept of choice. More specifically, there’s a huge and dramatic debate over the idea that someone “chooses” depression or anxiety. I myself have panic disorder as many of you know and it riles me up a bit to hear from someone that I chose at one point in my life to shake and sweat, …
 
As a therapist, I’ve been honored by many to try to help them work through their grief. And it can be raw, cutting off someone’s ability to breathe deeply or feel like they’re even breathing at all. Or want to. But when I met met Leslie Streeter, I knew I had to have her on SelfWork. Her story, told with candor, humor and grit, is about her husband…
 
It’s confession time here at SelfWork. People ask me all the time, “How do you have time for writing?” Or, “How do you come up with ideas?” Well, yesterday I was hitting a blank wall for this episode today. I’d start writing and then figure out I’d already written on the topic. Or I’d start something and talk myself out of it. But then, I decided t…
 
I have a request to make – and I fully realize how difficult it might be for some of you to consider this. So my request is made very respectfully.. I am writing a second book about the potential dangers of destructive perfectionism, of suppressed emotional pain, of hidden depression – and at its worst and most cruel, how those secrets and despair …
 
In today’s episode, sponsored by Athletic Greens, I want to talk about borderline personality disorder, but in a different way than I have before on SelfWork. I’ve mostly written about what it’s like to try to love someone with a serious personality disorder, like narcissism or borderline personality disorders. But today, I want to talk about what …
 
Today’s SelfWork, sponsored by BetterHelp, is all about answering your questions. We’re going to talk about everything from fear of failure (I'll talk about navigating my own failures) to negative forecasting (aka "catastrophizing" (to identifying depression when it’s been all you can remember to what’s termed maladaptive daydreaming. I learn a lot…
 
There are some people who are both humble and brilliant and Dr. Caroline Leaf is one of those people. She's a world renowned Neuroscientist, mental health and mind expert, bestselling author of Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess and host of Cleaning Up The Mental Mess podcast. In this episode, we have a fascinating conversation about the mind-brain conne…
 
Today, in this episode sponsored by BetterHelp, we’re going to focus on what psychologists call "a solid sense of self" - which is a little jargonistic for me. First we'll touch on the huge difference between codependence and interdependence, with the latter being so important in the development of trust and cooperation. Then we'll move onto the is…
 
We’re going to talk about what I term a "trilogy of trouble" today, or basically how jealousy, envy and possessiveness can sabotage a relationship or commitment. This can happen in personal as well as professional relationships, but we're mostly focused on personal aspects of the trio of trouble. Jealousy can emerge from fear and it can emerge from…
 
Today's You Get the Gist is a short bow to my own aging process - as today is my birthday! It became clear to me last week that when someone is using such figures as Colonel Sanders to encourage you to keep on keeping on - something has shifted! lolol.. So I looked for stories of very cool people that had done just that - and I found the awe-inspir…
 
I truly can't express how I feel about SelfWork being alive and well and celebrating its 5th anniversary! I couldn't do it without the listeners, the commenters, those who've emailed, those who've left ratings and reviews, those who listen week after week - or those of you who drop in from time to time. All of you are important, in fact vital. I’ve…
 
Welcome to a difficult episode of SelfWork, sponsored by BetterHelp. First of all, I need to state a trigger/content warning for anyone listening who was forced manipulatively, physically or sexually into a sexual relationship with a parent or grandparent. I’ve done an episode on sibling sexual abuse and received a lot of feedback, thanking me for …
 
Today I want to focus on the confusion that anyone can have about what's causing their depression. And the important question is, "Is it me or is it my relationship?" The episode is in answer to an email I received from a 20-something listener but is a confusing problem for many. They write, “I would love to not receive a solution, but just gain so…
 
Ashley Stahl is a counterterrorism professional turned career coach, spokesperson, and author of the bestselling book, You Turn: Get Unstuck, Discover Your Direction, Design Your Dream Career. Through her two viral TEDx speeches, her online courses, and her podcast, the You Turn Podcast, she’s been able to support clients in 31 countries in discove…
 
Many people these days are on an SSRI, a selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitor. Like Lexapro. Or Prozac. But there is some danger that needs mostly to be known to be prevented. There's a condition called serotonin syndrome, where you have too much serotonin in your system, that can be very dangerous. It doesn't happen that often, but you need to …
 
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