Greg Fitzsimmons and Mike Gibbons bring you a funny weekly summation of news straight from the Sunday Papers.
Hannah Gadsby weighs in on Chappelle, but Ted Sarandos holds his ground. A California woman throws sex parties for teenagers and Lindsey Graham is jealous of the Gucci bags Brazilian immigrants are bringing across the border. BTW Jonah Hill is not interested on what you think of his weight.
After recounting adventures at a celebrity golf tournament Greg and Mike played in this week, they laugh at The Bieb who was duped by a fake Tom Cruise. Anti-vaxers are trying to find jobs, and people on the Spectrum are trying to find love. Mike gives his review of Chappelle at The Hollywood Bowl and then Family Circus. Follow Mike Gibbons on Inst…
Dog The Bounty Hunter is here to solve the Gabby Petito murder! Brady heads to New England to settle some business and there is a new device which detects if you’re high (use promo code Doug Benson). Also Brett Kavanaugh has Covid and a gay hairdresser has jumped ship.
This week Mike is in Montana and Greg is in CT and there are a lot of dead bodies in the news. The live ones include a groping Chris Cuomo, a divorced Elon Musk, a gun wielding woman who wants her Chipotle and Cpt Kirk is going back to space. Follow Mike Gibbons on Instagram @GibbonsTime
Our 1st LIVE PODCAST! From the stage of the Sacramento Punchline we bring you a loving tribute to Norm MacDonald, discuss Bill Cosby and Ellen’s comebacks and audience members give us local news stories from SAC Town.
Comedians in the news this week: John Mulaney, Patton Oswalt, Steve Martin, and some shit Greg talked about Marc Maron that we edited out. Texas promises to stop ALL rape and a Florida Man story that hits the trifecta: nudity, drunkenness and police activity. Oh yeah, and a golf cart.
A grown man sues his parents for throwing out his porn, a redneck almost kidnaps his kids principal for making the child wear a mask, and we pay our respects to 2 gentlemen who crashed while in the back of a self driving Tesla. RIP Leland.
We open with a Sturgis update and talk about a principal who’s been fired for telling a joke about a crustacean. Mike raves about Billie Eilish's new album and Greg buries KISS. One of our friends got herpes. Follow Mike Gibbons on Instagram @GibbonsTime
From Mike's favorite show "Dave," Andrew Santino calls in and riffs on the news. Sturgis update: less DUIs, more STDs. Also, an 84 year old man robs a bank in AZ. He must have thought he was in FL. Follow Andrew Santino on Twitter @CheetoSantino Follow Mike Gibbons on Instagram @GibbonsTime
This week’s Florida Man is the entire state of Florida, and aging bikers are already stacking up in the hospitals of Sturgis, SD. Greg defends New York’s status as the greatest city in the world, and Mike tries to bleep out some inappropriate content. Follow Mike Gibbons on Instagram @GibbonsTime
Sturgis is back! Motorcycle festival has not yet begun and they’re crashing their bikes already. Greg beams in from NY so we give a serenade to the Big Apple and take a giant shit on San Diego. We also cover the man taped to a Frontier Airline seat and FLA cop who moonlights as a clown names PoPo.
As each country reinforces stereotypes about themselves in Tokyo, we throw Billy Joel under the bus for his lyrics (Bernie Taupin gets the week off). Lot of tears shed for ScarJo and it’s Greg and Erin’s anniversary!
Greg reveals his new tattoo and Mike continues his assault on Bernie Taupin. While Jeff Bezos flies through space, one of his pregnant workers miscarries after being denied lighter duty. We make it funny!
Mike comes down on Bernie Taupin. Plus, COVID sniffing dogs, McConaughey running for Governor of TX, QAnon fights for Britney, and this week’s Emmy nominations. Follow Mike Gibbons on Instagram @GibbonsTime
Mike reviews the Rogan/Chappelle/ Segura/ show in Vegas and reveals his new fixation on teen dramas. Giant Pandas are back! Will they now be hunted? Lot of love to fellow comics today. Positive Energy! Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Mike Zooms in from NY to talk about Cosby’s new standup tour dates, a Florida Man skulled by a medieval Axe and misadventures with Andy Dick. Follow Mike Gibbons on Instagram @GibbonsTime
Mike hits Greg with a quiz on Cancel Culture, John McAfee didn’t kill himself and Jeff Keane appears to have not tried very hard on Family Circus this week. Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Greg and Mike celebrate Father's Day by discussing Batman being banned from oral sex by DC, Biden being banned from Communion by the Bishop and Atomik - an artisanal alcoholic spirit made from ingredients grown in the Chernobyl plant - being banned by the Russians. Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime…
Top story: Our daughters graduated high school together this week! Just as important, however, a nun with a gambling habit, topless photos of Elliot Page and a football coach in OH forces a Jewish kid to eat pork.
Obama talks about UFO’s while a 9 yr old girl steals the family car. Listeners submit their own captions for Family Circus and fan mail from a Danish boarding school proves the show has a long reach!
Mike joins TikTok, a Starbucks barista a is fired for mocking a drink and Greg invites The Church of Scientology to kill his dog. Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Greg Zooms in from NYC while a FLA gator chases fat people through a Wendy’s parking lot. Someone pays Bezos $3M for 11 minutes in a space ship with him. Meanwhile you can spend 11 minutes with Mike in his closet for $37 cash. Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Chrissy Teigen and Ellen getting cancelled. Rough week for women, but none of their weeks were as bad as the woman in NC (NOT FLA!) who lit herself on fire while hoarding gasoline.
Happy Mother’s Day! Billy Crystal weighs in on cancel culture and Elon Musk hosts SNL. McGregor gives Mayweather a head slap and Tom Brady gets a $6M boat. How did he afford it? He only got $2M from the PPP Loan program.
We crush on the Winklevoss twins and have a beautiful guest play the birthday game and ask out Mike. Brought to you by http://Audible.com/Papers and http://HelloFresh.com/Papers12 Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Greg Zooms in from the City of Brotherly Love while Mike sits in his closet hoping his daughter doesn’t hear him roasting Caitlyn Jenner. A listener joins us to play “Guess Your Birthday” and Chris Denman has the shits. Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
An extended length podcast where Greg admits to coming around on Khruangbin and we describe a Florida man jumping a drawbridge in a mini-van. Listener contest announced for next week!
It’s Mike’s birthday and he celebrates by sitting alone in a closet and laughing at a man (not in FLA!) who molested an Elmo doll. NSFW. May not be safe for home either.
The Girl Scouts take a beating this week, our horoscope tells us to buy a Porsche on credit and we have a new rule about who is allowed to wear a thong to the beach.
Prince Harry gets his 1st real job; and his 1st boss who isn’t wearing a crown. Amazon drivers are shitting in packages and poor Ellen’s ratings have fallen by half.
Looking for more on Woody vs Mia? Not going to find it here! Instead we double up on Florida Man, shit on the Queen and pay our respects to the great Marvelous Marvin Hagler.
Piers vs Meghan, Woody vs Mia and Cuomo vs a whole bunch of people. The men are down 0-3 this week. Plus the Vatican is down a few hundred million. Where does the money go?
Thanks to our sponsor, Audible (http://audible.com/papers). Episode 53. Wanna hear 2 middle aged white guys defend Woody Allen and Dr. Seuss? We're here for you! Also, the existential debate over what you would do if you found 70 lbs of cocaine on the beach.
Thanks to our sponsor, Audible (http://audible.com/papers). Episode 52. Relax, America: Gaga got her kidnapped dogs back, no one was injured when a Florida man threw an alligator into a Wendy’s drive-through and, according to Gibbons, Woody did NOTHING wrong.
This week Mike defends Woody Allen and our producer Chris defends Qanon. In Fla two people dress as old women to get vaccinated and the new sex robots are here that come complete with bad attitudes. Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Mike Pays Greg the $400 he lost on the SB, The Boss gets busted, Aunt Jemima is cancelled and Family Circus finally owns up to being a sham.
Mike places a $400 bet with Greg on the Super Bowl. We also cover German sperm, a Jamaican weed shortage and a Florida Man who really commits.
Mike is livid about the GameStop stock scandal. Greg’s not happy about Polish abortions. Both are a little disappointed in this week's Family Circus. Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
While other news sources focus on the Inauguration, Sunday Papers takes a hard look at UGGS for dogs, a happy ending for a wife in Turks and Caicos and Lil Wayne’s pardon from Trump.
Big political week? Not on Sunday Papers! We give you a rest and focus on missing Bitcoins, penis cages and what a single mother of 3 can expect to make posting nude pix on the internet.
Slow news week but we manage to drum up some stories about Sylvester Stallone’s mom, a Danish kids show featuring a giant penis and, oh yeah, the attempted overthrow of the government.
The Annual predictions are made and we see how Greg & Mike did with last year’s picks. Did country star Tyler Rich kill a man while jogging? Or was it Wheeler Walker Jr? Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Mike snaps out of his Christmas hangover to talk to Greg about a Santa stuck in power lines, a father-son double murder and frozen Iguanas falling from the trees in FL. Follow Mike on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Man sues parents for tossing out his porn collection, Florida Man dies of COVID ON a flight out of Orlando & the Bee Gees Doc is off the charts.
This week we talk about cracking the Zodiak Killer’s code, hunting for whale vomit and Marines taking LSD. Did Tom Brady take a $1M PPP loan after buying a $2M yacht? Yup.
Patriots owner Robert Kraft is off scot-free but the masseuse owes $30k in fines to the court. He’s worth $6B. Adolph Hitler wins an election in Africa and Carole Baskin is this week’s “Florida Man”!
It’s a party! Cher saves an elephant and the Taiwanese parliament is hurling pig intestines at each other. Dagwood sucks...
Florida Man this week is a guy sitting in the front row of Greg’s show in Tampa. Mike is out of toilet paper and WTF is running down Rudy’s face? Follow Mike Gibbons on Twitter @GibbonsTime
Consenting sex robots, a very hands on Florida theme park, and "Baby Fae" is remembered - Joanne writes in, still has a crush.
New president- same Sunday Papers! Magic mushrooms and Exorcism in Portland and, as always, Florida Man comes through big.