show episodes
 
The podcast that watched Downton Abbey so you didn't have to is still going! Just like your favorite British period piece, but with more feelings and swears! Bask in the glory of Dame Maggie Smith as hilarious Anglophiles Kelly Anneken & Amy Schneider explore the class struggle, history, fashion, and the art of staring wistfully into the middle distance on Downton Abbey, The Crown, Mr. Selfridge, Peaky Blinders, every Titanic film ever made, Pride & Prejudice, and much more! See acast.com/pr ...
 
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show series
 
*gong noise* Kelly and Amy are back with a little holiday cheer as they recap Kenneth Branagh's A Midwinter's Tale (or In the Bleak Midwinter to our UK Cousins), a 1995 black-and-white love letter to Shakespeare, the power of live theatre and Joan Collins. They discuss their obsession with Bravo's Below Deck Mediterranean, people making horrible ch…
 
NEAME willing, Kelly & Amy are proud to present their last Downton Abbey recap ever. All your favorites are here for the movie: Fashion Backwards, Amy Repeats History and a litany of goofy-ass callbacks to episodes past. They worry that this movie might get nominated for a gd Oscar, speculate about Matthew Goode's reaction to being contractually ob…
 
Kelly & Amy overcome texts not going through to bring you the golden episode of Victoria, S2E2. They chat about Tilda Swinton, Dadbert and DODubs dividing up all the arts, the deliciousness of Ernst, poor baby Ada Lovelace, the rudeness of Shakespeare fans, Victorian Shake Weights, Lord M playing The Sims, marriage advice from Lord Byron, and the f…
 
Kell & Amy are back and they feel like Slurms Mackenzie! For their recap of Victoria S2E1, they get to sit at the baronet's table! They also go off on a trans tangent, instruct people to take care of the smegma in their own eyes, curse out Lionel Bart, suggest an unusual method of birth control, and encourage everyone to read more novels. See acast…
 
Gather round, wrigglepantses! It's the S1 finale of Victoria and Kelly & Amy are throwing up some nein signs. They discuss the vagaries of digital copyrights, apologize to to Alex Jennings, tell Vicky to stop watching makeup tutorials on YouTube, first-year marital strife, Lehzen's wet nurse requirements, Victorian maternity wear, terrible editoria…
 
Kelly & Amy round the corner on S1E7 of Victoria. They're still not having it with 50 Shades of Chef, but otherwise enjoy this exploration of the Industrial Revolution. Kelly has a broom for a hand, Amy is somewhat boring and everyone's gotta find out what happened with Aquaman! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.…
 
Kelly & Amy realy have the gigles in this recap of Victoria S1E6. They also fire Daisy Goodwin, experience the joys of Cecilia Buggin, explain sentient couch insurance options, dig into morganatic marriages, reveal that you can be horny and a good person at the same time, diss extremely slow southern accents, praise Wellington for living his best l…
 
Kelly & Amy speak truth to Medium and call Louisa May Alcott out for her lies in their recap of Victoria S1E5. They also make fun of Kentucky and California, hail Coburg: home of the sinister laugh, take applications for ladle bitches, and smack talk parents. Kelly makes a sweet burn on the privy council, Amy imagines herself as a cokehead, and eve…
 
We open at the milk bar as Kelly and Amy recap Victoria S1E4 and really get to know the "enthralling but prickly" Albert. The also delve into the upside of the opiod epidemic, declare England to be the Kentucky of Europe, wonder where servants sign up to get in on the scamming, suggest that Alex Jones should change his name, shame Vicky's fat-shami…
 
Kelly & Amy encounter a real Michigan J. Frog situation in their recap of Victoria S1E3. They also hate on suburban Connecticut and Coburg, speculate about bonnets, decide Vicky's mom is a vampire, discuss the challenges of shaking a stalker who is also the queen, wonder why Sir John speaks in an evil accent 100% of the time, and finally meet Princ…
 
Kelly & Amy are back at it with a recap of Victoria S1E2. Vicky's mom does not have it going on, Victorian necklines are terrible, the House of Lords is just a lower key version of Mrs. Patmore yelling, the portrait of Jenna Coleman doesn't look like Jenna Coleman, various people are rude on nuns, no one can make a cake without grifting, there's an…
 
Rejoice! GLORIANA! Kelly & Amy make their triumphant return to podcasting with this recap of Victoria S1E1. Unfortunately, Amy's computer crashed while she was editing this episode, banishing them to the land of wind and ghosts, so we don't have our usual hilarious show notes. The episode itself survived, so please to enjoy it, because Amy also los…
 
The gaffes have it as Kelly & Amy return to explain why everyone looks like that on The Crown and Call the Midwife. They chat about how trans people are everywhere, Lucille Ball's natural hair color, purported bisexual James Dean, makeups, mainstreaming science fiction, the politics of African American hair, Rose's character on Downton Abbey, minis…
 
Kelly & Amy are finally back from their break with Part 1 of the long-awaited Fashion Backwards/Amy Repeats History episode for The Crown S2 and all of Call the Midwife! Their research is as shallow and unreliable as ever as they discuss how fun it is to say Givenchy when talking about Meghan Markle's wedding dress, which fictional Roz Elton John i…
 
It's a special #sorrynotsorry binge-recap of Call the Midwife S6, featuring episodes 4-8! First, Kelly & Amy catch each other up on Top Chef, The Crown casting news, Kids' Baking Championship, and The Alienist. Then they get down to business, outing Patsy as not a Good Lesbian, declaring that time doesn't exist in Poplar, bemoaning the dying art of…
 
Kelly & Amy are looking for lesbians in their discussion of Call the Midwife S6, Episodes 1-3, the show where everyone's pregnant until proven otherwise! They also get into pregnancy tongue twisters, diss medical residents, briefly welcome back Agnes Towler and narrative economy, and get in on Sister Monica Joan's television scam. Kelly still misse…
 
Kelly conveys her deep dislike of Call the Midwife's S6 Christmas Special to Amy and they flit through a discussion of the once & future Santa of Poplar, a confusing take on apartheid, Sister Nobody's gingerhood, sick burns on Nurse Boring, and cranky old white dudes realizing that people use water for things. Kelly cannot pronounce El Alamein, Amy…
 
Kelly cries a whole bunch as she describes Call the Midwife S5 Episodes 6, 7 & 8 to Amy. She weaves a tale of surrogate screamers, Nonnatus House Yelp reviews, great bangs, the importance of wearing shorts, Bryllcreem, barge people, and unresolved mystery apples. Kelly has a lot of criticisms of Words with Friends, Amy's a walking Magna Carta, and …
 
Kelly dives into Muriel Spark's excellent novel The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie, the inspiration for the film of the same name. She figures out that Sandy is probably a Scorpio, assigns each girl in Brodie's set one of the Seven Deadly Sins, complains about Camelot, and gets excited about the rest of the book. If you can't get enough of Brodie's Set,…
 
Kelly & Amy lead with Gaunt in this free preview of their 5 Maggie Smiths coverage! Get over to Patreon to pledge $1 or more for access to exclusive content, including Whalecast, We Are Not Amused & upcoming 5 Maggie Smiths recaps of Hook, The VIPS, Harry Potter & the Goblet of Fire & Sister Act! See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out inform…
 
Kelly & Amy finish their coverage of The Crown S2E10 because, luckily, one of them was not snatched away by a passing pterodactyl. They offer a course in Remedial Pimping & Adultery 101, agree that cruelty is ground zero for comedy, speculate about Liz's word of the day calendar, tell Margaret to keep her rumors to herself, celebrate the beginning …
 
Kelly & Amy struggle through their recap of the excellent but very painful The Crown S2E9. They discuss the foosball loophole, Eton's absurdly ugly uniforms, sweaters v. jumpers, little known facts about the Magna Carta and Peter Pan, whether Dr. Hahn and his weird mute secretary are vampires, chide Stephen Daldry for his timeline fuckery, rank the…
 
In their recap of The Crown S2E8, Kelly & Amy chat about pants made of butts, laugh at moms who can't do anything right, log a Porchie sighting, wonder if Jackie Kennedy can properly inseminate a horse, imagine Liz's unlikely chain of animal enforcers, and are delighted by an apparent foxtrot! Kelly offers a glimpse into the madness behind her edit…
 
Kelly & Amy open up an infinity mirror of gender in their recap of The Crown S2E7. They chat about turkeys in Oakland, little known facts about the Warsaw Pact, what it takes to make a Ryan Murphy, the actual worst parent on a show filled with them, childhood train trauma, the first and only "Lilibet" of the season, the royal swarm, and Replacement…
 
Bobbety Watch 2018 is over in Kelly & Amy's recap of The Crown S2E6! They cover the Patricia of forests, wonder what Tinky Winky is up to, mock the DODubs for thinking "jobs" are the same as "pointless makeworks that don't require any skills, encourage everyone to not protect Nazis, speculate about Liz's conversations with God, side with Phil for a…
 
Semantic humor abounds in Kelly & Amy's recap of The Crown S2E5 as they discuss Tommy LaMoustache's dogs who look just like him, ITV versus Netflix, Dudey McRapeface, stubble in training, the racism inherent to Looney Tunes, a semi-gay sexual orientation, Liz's ourobouros of the face, whether Patricia is an actual person, and the 1950s version of y…
 
Kelly & Amy agree that Peaky Blinders is a funny name for a show as they wrap up their S4 coverage. They wonder about Comrade Baby's upbringing, decide that Tom Hardy dissed Adrian Brody (not to his face), declare Abalama Ding Dong to be their best nickname ever, demand a band called Jack Dawson & the Titanics, congratulate Linda on coming a long w…
 
Someday Kelly & Amy will record an episode that doesn't reference Newsies, but that day is not today. In their recap of Peaky Blinders S4E5, they try to figure out who wasn't embarrassd by WWI, debate whether GRAAAACE or Sam Neil would make a better zombie, get nostalgic for Danny Whizz Bang & conrade Baby, beg for a line of Lady Blinders' coats, h…
 
Things are starting to not suck in this recap of The Crown S2E4 (in spite of its on-the-nose music cues). Kelly & Amy dig into Vanessa Kirby's powerhouse performance as Princess Margaret aka the Heisenberg of the monarchy, say hello to the original party satellite, tell Phil to keep his banana out of the produce aisle, suggest that Mrs. Mac use a p…
 
Kelly & Amy introduce a 3-point system for fixing men in this recap of The Crown S2E3. They also decide that medical marijuana won't help A & E, the only marital aids available in the 50s were beards and crude wooden devices, Eileen is winning her divorce a la Angelina Jolie, Thursday is not even a good day of the week, and Mike wins the award for …
 
Kelly & Amy celebrate the Summer of Menzies in December with their recap of Peaky Blinders S4E4. They cheer the return of the Peaky pimp walk, wonder why everyone's raggin' on Linda's mom, invoke the Halle Berry mafia, unexpectedly compliment Aiden Gillen, decide babies need beer, and beg Steve!Knight for fewer monologues and more Horse Bitch. Kell…
 
Kelly & Amy learn that some girls are more important than others in their recap of Peaky Blinders S4E3. They discuss Selective Grace Syndrome, the Luncheon Kingdom, try to figure out when Pol got her hair cut, lobby for the dissolution of Future Arsonists of America, diagnose Adrien Brody with lockjaw, decry Cillian's stupid pocket of convenient re…
 
Kelly & Amy dive into Episodes 4 & 5 of Call the Midwife S5. They visit Paint Town, decide no one lives on the Isle of Man, and conclude that birthing is all about positive reinforcement. Kelly gets so worried about Paddington, Amy discovers a gift worse than socks, and everyone agrees this show is kind of a Dickens novel. See acast.com/privacy for…
 
Kelly & Amy recap Peaky Blinders S4E2. Full description coming soon! NOTE: We had a lot of technical issues on this episode, which was recorded remotely. We've fixed as much as we can, but you may notice some weird noise or gaps in plot. Our apologies and thanks for your patience. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.…
 
Kelly & Amy recap S5 Episodes 2 & 3 of Call the Midwife, and what a special guest they have in Mr. Mason! They also chat about Rosie the Riveter (for breastfeeding), dock sickness, a possible Victorian term for "chamber pot," the CTM Maris, and the show's inexhaustible fake suspense box. Kelly reveals that consciousness is a scourge, Amy doesn't ow…
 
Kelly & Amy do their best for a change as they recap the very welcome return of Peaky Blinders! They also cope with Post Traumatic Downton Syndrome, discuss dark prayers, violate copyright law, celebrate two Christmases, ponder Britain's many accents relative to its modest size, laugh at Tommy Shelby's jokes, discover a new Charlie Murphy, and visi…
 
Kelly & Amy spot the first corgis of the season in their recap of The Crown S2E2. Things are looking bad for HRH the Duke of Edinburgh in an episode that boasts a lack of attorney-client privilege, activation of the Mountbatten family history subplot, Emma Thompson getting Greg Wise promoted to series regular, a reporter by way of Degrassi, and an …
 
Kelly, Amy & all your favorite royals are back with recaps of S2 of Peter Morgan's The Crown! They compare Hollywood royals versus the real thing, break it to Mike's daughter that he loves her less than hookers, reveal something surprising about Horatio Hornblower, beg Liz not to read Phil's emails, discuss the logistics of getting rid of a ghost b…
 
By order of their Patreon supporters, Kelly & Amy switch up the format with "Tell the Midwife:" Kelly sobs her way through Call the Midwife and then tells Amy what happened. In this episode, they cover Season 5's first two-part Christmas special and Episode 1. Get ready to party with Nurse Cranky, Nurse Boring, and Sister Nobody, reset the counter …
 
Kelly finally makes good on her promise to dissect The Royal We by The Fug Girls, Jessica Morgan and Heather Cocks, a book that has everything--words, foreshadowing & romance, even! This is a whole chilled out thing, and you can listen to this one for freesies as Kelly Googles where Megan Markle is from in real time! Get over to Patreon to hear the…
 
Kelly & Amy finally make good on their promise of a Regency-era standalone episode to pair with their 1995 Pride & Prejudice recaps (available on Patreon)! In their usual hastily researched fashion, they discuss rickety Game of Thrones magic, the history of Latin American independence, bathroom stuff, Britain's stylish but otherwise reprehensible G…
 
Kelly & Amy are back with irritated sniping and an unexpected recap of the very upsetting 2001 HBO movie Conspiracy. Get ready for Rogue One spoilers, Millenial blindness, a new UYDS motto, Bugs Bunny's directorial debut, laws like ice cream, two anti-Semitic Martin Luthers, Instagram Farben, Peak Colin Firth, the importance of choosing a non-evil …
 
Kelly & Amy risk heat stroke to bring you this recap of Wolf Hall S1E6, Master of Phantoms. They get wistful for the Whore Institute, complain about Game of Thrones, feel grateful that lawful divorce no longer needs to require murder, criticize Anne's beheading getup, whine about the lack of cutlery, assert that not every problem can be solved by s…
 
Kelly & Amy implore you to never shake a wolf in their recap of Wolf Hall S1E5, Crows. They also remind everyone that the rift is in Cardiff, Gardiner is still ugly, girls' crossbows have ribbons on them, Jane Seymour is a super genius, and it's always time for modesty. Kelly wishes they were playing Duck Hunt, Amy takes remedial smelling classes, …
 
Kelly & Amy quote a lot of other tv shows in their recap of Wolf Hall, S1E4. They also coin a term to describe a group of Boleyns, tell everyone to stop doing cocaine, appreciate punctuation humor, wonder if dick tapestries were a thing, talk smack about Bran on Game of Thrones, and declare this possibly the best episode of Wolf Hall (although ther…
 
Condragulations are in order as Kelly & Amy recap Wolf Hall S1E3! Strap on your trigger warnings as they cast "My Fair Lady 2: The Sexting," popesplain, introduce the Bible-52s, talk smack about Henry and Anne's wedding, and laugh at Thomas More. Kelly's been an asshole since birth, Amy is wearing cute sandals, and no one understands what Jane Seym…
 
Kelly & Tom celebrate the Willennium in their recap of Wolf Hall, S1E2. They ID the Sam and Diane of Austin Friars, ask some witch friends about stuff, submit a show to the fringe festival, talk about Pride weekend two weeks late, figure out how you get myxamatosis, and head to the patent office. Kelly tells a cool story, Tom reminisces about Air J…
 
Kelly & Tom return from Patreon to bring you coverage of the first episode of Wolf Hall! They struggle to remember lines from Labyrinth, the name of England, the plot of Barry Lyndon, and the Merlin of America. Kelly chooses Rafe, Tom wins a Booker Prize, and everybody hopes you forget that we were supposed to be covering Call The Midwife instead. …
 
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