show episodes
 
O
Oz 9

1
Oz 9

Shannon K Perry

Unsubscribe
Unsubscribe
Monthly+
 
Spring 2142 and Gated Galaxies has launched its 400 Oz-8000 ships, each carrying 50,000 "resting guests" to, hopefully, a new home on a shiny, brand-new planet. As soon as they find one. IF they find one. This is the story of one of those ships – the Oz 9 – and its tiny crew of hopeless incompetents. So far, they've been in space half an hour and several hundred people are dead. So... bright future, clearly.
 
Loading …
show series
 
LOOK. I never said it would be the MORNING of September 19, I just said it would be ON September 19, so I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT. It's episode 61, and incredibly, it seems our crew might have actually lost some brain cells over the hiatus. I swear, if there's a skull and crossbones on it, this crew wants to eat it, marry it, or at least put it in th…
 
We'd like to dedicate this second hiatus episode to our one fan in Zambia. To date, according to our stats, there have been 86 downloads in Zambia. We figure that's one fan who listened to every episode, including all the hiatus and bonus stuff, and to him, her, or them, we say a profound "thank you!" And the same "thank you" to everyone who listen…
 
This one is a beast. Go to the bathroom, get some water, maybe load up on some snacks. Is your listening device charged? Get comfy. We have a lot to tell. You've been listening to: Tim Sherburn as Colin, Buck, and Emily Richard Cowen as Leet and Percival slash Tiberius Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie Eric Perry as Dr von Haber Zetzer, Howard, J…
 
You've been awesome! No, really. I'd love to be able to reward your patience, but instead I just have an episode. I know it's not much, but I made it myself. One more episode to close out the season: are you ready? No. You're not. Sorry, but you are SO not ready. You're listening to: Lee Shackleford as Pluto Kevin Hall as Felonius and Greg Bonnie B…
 
With just three episodes (well, this one plus two more) left in the season, is that a cliff I see ahead? With a small branch protruding from its face, just right for hanging? Things are moving along at a rapid pace, much like the Oz 9 isn't, and there are surprises, tears, laughter, warming of hearts, girding of loins, rending of garments, and poss…
 
This episode begins with a funeral, so you might want to have tissues handy. The production assistant was supposed to get hypo-allergenic flowers for the ceremony but managed to find hyper-allergenic ones, which don't only make you sneeze, they cram themselves up your nose until you beg for mercy. The PA has been fwipped, so if you have even remote…
 
I'm contractually obligated to tell you that we're running a Kickstarter campaign to try to fund turning Oz 9 into a comic book. So please give us money, if you can, or tell other people to give us money. Or both. Thanks and whatever. Here's a surprise: Jessie doesn't like comics. She says they're too colourful and she's never read one. I would hav…
 
OK, OK, yes, it's late AGAIN. We know. We've been having a really rough time lately, the kids are sick, the roof caved in when we had that thunderstorm last week, and then there was that other thing.... No, you're right. None of that is true. Our alarm is a bored dude just saying "alarm alarm alarm" over and over, so clearly this is not a well-fina…
 
All the backstory you never wanted and then some. We find out some stuff about Le Bichon Frise, some other stuff about Donna, blah blah blah. Greg falls over at one point, so that's pretty funny. I'd say "sorry it's so late," but I feel like I ought to be it before I say it. So.... It's late. You've been listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Donna and J…
 
The universe may be crashing around your ears, but as long as you know the difference between who and whom and how to scoop up a dangling participle, you'll be all right. It's kind of like knowing where your towel is. In this very special episode, a guest pops onto the ship and into Leet's arms, and for a few moments at least, all seems right with …
 
Do you know how to disable an invisible alarm? Yeah, well, listen close; someone on our crew is about to tell you. Well, maybe... we're not entirely sure it works, so I don't know that I'd test it at the Louvre. Maybe Paddy MacDougal's Museum O'Naughty Limericks and Saucy Sea Shanties first. Just steer clear of the green milkshakes. Actually, that'…
 
The crew aboard the Oz 9 are stalactites, holding tight to the ceiling in unexpected zero Gs, and the crew on the ground are stalagmites, who might survive if a crabby, oddly dressed ancient god decides to let them go. You know, same old same old. Oz 9 is back from holiday break, though why a crew that typically works a solid seven-minute day needs…
 
To punish Kevin Hall for having the gall to ... something, I can't remember what it was he did, but for sure he did something really bad to merit this kind of response.... Anyway, maybe just to be mean, we made him relisten to Oz 9, write a bunch of trivia questions, then ask them to four people who among them could barely scrape up an answer to th…
 
EARLIER SOUND ISSUES HAVE BEEN CORRECTED, AND OUR PRODUCTION PERSON HAS BEEN FWIIIIIIIIIIII...... What happens when the alien aboard your ship gets hungry? Usually really gross things involving lots of blood and gore and that, but fortunately for us, the grossest thing in this episode is a small critter popping out of an orifice. Which is actually …
 
Humans on the receiving end of divine affections don't do so well, mythologically speaking. However, after having seen Donna in action, the smart money is on the homo sapien. Pluto better watch his gold lamé onesie, if he knows what's good for him. With this episode, we are officially halfway through Season 3 of Oz 9, so let's all take a moment to …
 
I'd apologize for this being so late, but if you think about it, I gave you an extra 16-and-a-half Oz-free hours, which is, like, a decade in idiot years. It's been a long day aboard the Oz 9. You think bad decision making is easy — Doritos for dinner? Yes, please. Easy! Go for a run or drink chocolate milk with vodka? Vodka. Definitely. Easy! —and…
 
Remember how there was that one week you were sick or maybe just on vacation but too poor to go anywhere? And you watched daytime TV, and even though you knew it was ridiculous and cheesy, by Friday you were desperate to know if little Suzy really was Armoire's daughter and if Aristato would find Nectarina in time to stop her from marrying ... I do…
 
What would you do if everything in your garden suddenly attacked you? Carrots shooting themselves at your eyes, radishes nibbling tiny, spicy holes in your ankles, kohlrabi shouting at you, probably in German, given how "kohlrabi" is spelled — does it seem German to you? just me? — and let's not even talk about what the watermelon is trying to do. …
 
Probably the most remarkable thing that happens in this entire episode is that Le Bichon Frise pronounces "assassinate" correctly. I know. We were pretty shocked too. It happens at the bottom of page 3, so if you just want to hear that and skip the rest, I don't suppose anyone would blame you. Oh, and there's a bit about a butterfly that's funny. Y…
 
It's really late. The kind of late that keeps on getting later until it circles back round to early. When I'm this blurry and tired, I'm likely to say anything. Like how much more bearable life became on this ship with we busted Dr. Theo out of his pod. Geeky never looked so good.... See, now what did I say? Stop with the questions and the "oooo te…
 
If you've been keeping up with the antics of that zany crew aboard the Oz 9- Have you ever considered taking up a REAL hobby? Like stamps or shuffleboard or knitting quilts or something? It's episode 44, and no one is any smarter than they were 43 episodes ago, and that includes you, since your brain is no doubt deteriorating at a much faster clip …
 
Perhaps you've heard about the mold that's eating radioactive materials around Chernobyl? And that scientists are considering insulating spacecraft and astronauts suits with the stuff to protect them from solar radiation? We're not imagining things up here. We're just ahead of our time. You've been listening to: Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia…
 
Something nefarious is happening on a golf course in French Lick, Indiana. Actually, several nefarious things. Well, OK, like, three... maybe four nefarious things, and then a whole bunch of naughty things. Look, we're losing the point here. Look, just listen to the episode. It'll be easier than me trying to explain it to you. You've been listening…
 
Welcome back, space monkeys! We hope you enjoyed your six-week excursion ashore. Watch your step, the gangplank is slippery and also there's no oxygen out here, so look lively. Take your seats, please; we'll be setting adrift...sorry, a-sail again soon. No eating, please; we just got the toilets clean. Now. Where were we.....? You've been listening…
 
If you've ever wondered about our crew's lives before they got wrapped up in the drama of the Oz 9, well, keep wondering, because you're not going to learn a damn thing from this disaster of an episode. You're listening to: Eric Perry as Dr. von Haber Zetzer and Sarah Golding as pretty much everybody else. Except Richard Nadolny as the Narrator. Ou…
 
If you think Oz 9 looks like chaos from the front, well, it's just as raggedy and unkempt 'round the back (if slightly less dangerous). In this bonus episode for our hiatus, our 4 newest cast members, David S. Dear, Sarah Golding, Kevin Hall, and Iri Alexander, gathered to talk about life as a voice actor and the swirling tornado of imminent doom t…
 
The Oz ships failed under mysterious circumstances entirely caused by their on-board crews or natural disaster wholly unrelated to Gated Galaxies or its subsidiaries, officers, or agents. G2 accepts no responsibility or liability for loss of liberty, limb, or life due to incorrect use of machinery, gross negligence, intentional or reckless miscondu…
 
It's the end of Season 2, and our crew are still dumb, still in space, and still hovering at the edge of death. Thanks to all the zig zagging around the galaxy, they're nearly back where they started, and the forniculator still hasn't been fixed. So, if you've been with us for the past 39 episodes, well, you probably could have skipped this bit. Le…
 
Episode 39 means one more until the end of Season 2, and where we're going is no clearer than the muck at the bottom of the bioswamp. But hey, you've gotten this far, you might as well stick with us a little longer. Eventually, it'll all make sense. Or not. Probably not. You've been listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Kevin Hall as Greg and Fel…
 
Look, I've been up all night, and seriously the first person to speak to me may find themselves trying to pour coffee into a stump. Like, where their head used to be, not a tree, that was supposed to be sort of threatening and scary. Never mind. Make sure you listen right to the end as there's treats and stuff you won't want to miss. Oh, and Head 1…
 
Despite Joe's best attempts to keep the Oz 9 free of ... icky things, a very large, armed, and presumably hostile icky thing has taken over the bridge. This has just been one of those space voyages, hasn't it? You're listening to: Iri Alexander as Julie Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise Eric Perry as Joe, Head 1, and Dr. von …
 
Pod poetry is generally considered to be the 3rd worst in the universe. If you have a weak liver or any sort of cheese allergy, you might want to check with a doctor before listening to this episode. You're listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Jessie and Donna Richard Cowen as Leet and Tyberius Iri Alexander as Julie Sarah Golding as Mrs. Sheffield Jun…
 
Beans — BIG beans — are about to be spilled aboard the Oz 9, and that could spell trouble for the crew. Especially if the beans land in a very particular way that happens to spell "trouble." And someone aboard the Oz 9 is not doing their job. I realize I should probably narrow that down for you, as it's a hefty list, but just listen up and you'll f…
 
What do you do when your Otologostealth X13 runs out of charge? That wasn't actually a rhetorical question — the manual is in Ancient Mesopotamian (we think) and none of the charging cables we have fits. Anyone? Anyway, we say goodbye to a crewmate this episode, so get your hanky ready or use your sleeve or whatever, just prepare to have your innar…
 
No one said life in space would be easy. Though if they'd listened closely, the people buying seats on the Oz ships might have heard G2 officials mutter under their breath about how easy death in space was going to be ... Anyway, it's a Thursday aboard the Oz 9, which means Leet is optimistic about their chances of survival. He's alone in that, but…
 
I've pretty much decided that some weeks ago, I ate the fugu, and everything since has been some sort of weird fever dream. I mean, that's the only thing that makes sense, right? RIGHT? You’ve been listening to: Kevin Hall as Cal and Greg the Zebra Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Eric Perry as Joe, Dr. von Haber Zetzer, and Head One Tim Sherburn as Colin…
 
Otherwise known as "The Origin of Colin Smith," this mini ep gives some background into- Ah ah — you almost got me, there. Nope. I'm not telling. I'm afraid you'll have to listen like it's 2020 or something. You're listening to: Eric Perry as Mr. Southers Kevin Hall as Spotty Bosh and Richard Nadolny as your Narrator This episode was directed by Ju…
 
I... we... they... Seriously? This is... It just... SERIOUSLY? You've been listening to: June Clark Eubanks as Glenda and the Albatros Bonnie Brantley as Donna and Jessie Tim Sherburn as Colin, Buck, and Emily Eric Perry as Mr. Southers, Head 1, and Dr. von Haber Zetzer Richard Cowen as Leet Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise and Ben Shannon Perry as O…
 
It's the holiday season aboard the Oz 9, though how that happened when they launched in spring, like, a month ago, is anyone's guess. But whatever the case, there's a mysterious box in Cargo Bay 7, and whether it was delivered by Santa or Satan... well, I guess you'll have to listen to find out, now won't you? You're listening to: Bonnie Brantley a…
 
On December 4, 2019, Oz 9 did a live show at the South Side Podfest at Bar 171 in Chicago, Illinois. It was the evening of the Annual Assassins Holiday Dinner. Of course, the Albatros and le Bichon Frise attended, with chaperone Cpt. Madeline, who was very upset to learn that no one with any sense at all ate the delicious-smelling food. Thank you t…
 
Episode 29, in which we learn the meaning of the Scottish slang word "boaking." Repeatedly. In vivid color. In this episode, the world has gone topsy turvy — up is down, left is right, enemies are friends... But the fugu is still poisonous, and our crew are still idiotic and imperiled. And there's a gecko. An amorous one. You’ve been listening to: …
 
An episode so full of unexpected twist and turns, you should probably schedule an appointment with your chiropractor now. Wet sandwiches, heat-resistant foxes, and some highly suspect popcorn flavoring are the very least of the crew's problems today, so be throw on some wooly slippers, grab a nibble that doesn't fight back, and enjoy NOT being on t…
 
Does it sometimes seem like everything that is trying to kill you wants to talk to you about it first? I mean, I don't really feel like I need to connect with you on an emotional level when I'm just trying to keep breathing. In episode 27, a very unexpected truth is revealed — but is it good news? Or very very bad indeed? Smart money's on bad. I'm …
 
Earth is starting to feel the loss of its most dependable consumers, it's chaos all 'round, and I got a fricking paper cut putting this episode together, so if you want to know what it's about, well, I guess you'll just have to listen, won't you. Just a reminder that you can see (and support) a live appearance of Oz 9, plus Relativity, Sage and Sav…
 
Leet's in Dr. von Haber Zetzer's lab, and you know no good can come of that. Colin is lethally in need of a nap, and the Albatros is on the hunt for a husband. Things are weird aboard the Oz 9, and that's saying something. You’ve been listening to: Bonnie Brantley as Jessie Aaron Clark as le Bichon Frise June Clark Eubanks as the Albatros Richard C…
 
Loading …

Quick Reference Guide

Copyright 2021 | Sitemap | Privacy Policy | Terms of Service
Google login Twitter login Classic login