Valkilmer Podcasts

An erotic thriller that's not sleazy and cheap? It sounds crazy but that's just what you get in this forgotten gem from 1992. Ivy seduces, uses, manipulates... but is she all that bad, really? Maybe, maybe not! Just don't say that to Sylvie. What Ivy wants, Ivy gets... even if you need to take a fall in the process! Joining as Special Guest Investi…

The adventures of Hercules continue, Bat fans! Arnold runs amok yet always with love in his heart... but no dough in his pockets. Hear the exciting conclusion to this epic film and equally as epic podcast! Joining our odyssey once more are our mythic dream team of Dael Kingsmill and Omar Najam! The next episode follows... soon. Same Bat Pod, differ…

Hercules needs some excitement in life... Olympus just ain't cuttin' it! How to spice things up a little? Why, by heading to Earth, befriending a dweeby pretzel salesman and attempting to become both a discus coach AND wrestling superstar, of course! Come and see the world's most perfect body! Joining our odyssey today are none other than Dael King…

OUR PATREON REVIEW NOW AVAILABLE FOR FREE Originally released on 07/03/22, just after the movie had hit cinemas. UNMASK THE TRUTH It's finally here - THE Batman is upon us! Hear Jon and Niall's first, initial, before-we've-had-a-proper-chance-to-digest-it, SPOILER-FILLED, takes on this momentous cinematic event. R-Batz has arrived and it's in fine …

I'm looking over the skyline of the city How loud quiet nights in the mist of crime How next door to happiness lives sorrow And signals of solution in the sky A city of justice, a city of love, a city of peace For everyone of us We all need it, can't live without it A Gotham City, oh yeah The next episode follows... soon. Same Bat Pod, different Ba…

Is it bright where you are Now the people changed? Does it make you happy, you're so strange? And in your darkest hour I hold secret's flame We can watch the world devoured in its pain The next episode follows on Friday. Same Bat Pod, different Bat Minute! Join us on Facebook at the Bat Minute Listener's Cave! The Bat Minute theme song is by the ba…

Scrolling, scrolling, our life scrolls on by. From Inferno to Goo Goo... from Moloko to Underworld... we're taking you on a text-based journey. The next episode follows on Wednesday. Same Bat Pod, different Bat Minute! Join us on Facebook at the Bat Minute Listener's Cave! The Bat Minute theme song is by the band Rat Bit Kit and Ash Lerczak (aka Do…

We tick along with torrents of text once more as we delve into the mysteries of ADR, R. Kelly and real quality in visual effects! Back once again are Liverpool's finest - the master of the limerick who's bringing it to you RAW, it's Rikky Wiley! Backing him up is that original creepy creature, Ash "Doc Horror" Lerczak! Nobody likes you when you're.…

COOL... AS... ICE! Whassup fellas? We're rollin’ into a new town today. This place looks WHACK! There’s nothing to do! Hold it - Johnny spots a hottie driving a horse... time to show her a real hero and make that jaw drop with some FRESH moves! Backin' up our MCs is homeboy Kit Flemons - AKA Kit Kat. We axed Kit to cruise with the crew 'cause he's …

Today we hold secret’s flame aloft for all to see as the credits continue unabated. You've got a plethora of Pumpkins, heroic hairstylists and one brilliant Batshop - all on the next exciting episode of Bat Minute! Back for one more crack at The Bat are a duo straight out of the Valley of the Demon - it's Rikky Wiley and Ash "Doc Horror" Lerczak! L…

Today, Zero, Bullet, Disarm, The End... we're Smashing some Pumpkins today, faithful listeners! It's Zwan-tastic! In our (haunted) house is the Skeletone Doc Horror himself, Ash Lerczak! Joining him is rapper, MC, comedy-doing-man and Ewok fan Rikky Wiley. Ash is bringing that original creepy creature chat and Rikky is serving up some dry white rhy…

Fiends of Dorothy.By Sleepy Charlie Media

Who? What? Where? When?By Sleepy Charlie Media

Barbara extends her hand to Dick… partners? She should be heading to school, but okay, sure, whatever. Regardless, he's totally in the friend zone maaaaaan! As the manor turns into an orphanage, our trio rush towards the camera in classic hero action. The original, the best... the end. Ever wanted to hear someone else? Now you can! Our investigatio…

Barbara wakes up to spot Alfred doing a-okay. He's FUMIN’ though! THE HOUSE IS A PIG STY! Ah, it's all tongue-in-cheek... phew! Bruce and Dick give each other mad props for the good job they did. Dick has a question though... why didn't The Bat save him? There was no need - after all, Dick has the skills and Babs kicked some botanical butt! Joining…

Ivy is in prison, but she has a visitor… SURPRISE! The legal system is a sham! NOT GOOD! The Wayne crew are having a nice little sleepover in the living room - how cute. They've had pizza and some drinks... but the one thing they need to REALLY complete their fun is just about to enter... Coming in over the wire... it's Professor Christy Porter! Ch…

A glowing, clearly-Mr Freeze-created, chemical is plugged in to Alfred’s drip. All we can do now is wait, I guess... Ivy is behind bars and is supposed to be a tad dishevelled... however she looks just as amazing as always! But he loves her... NOT?!?!?!? Back again and excavating the hidden truths of this episode is our resident rat-loving archaeol…

God Doggett!By Sleepy Charlie Media

Mask 4 Mask.By Sleepy Charlie Media

Batman pleads his case and asks “will you help me… doctor?” Reminding him of his Hippocratic oath there - very smooth move, Bats. Voila! Gauntlet vials to the rescue! Take two of these and call the good doctor in the morning. Back, back, back, back again is the Queen of Rats herself - digging deep, it's Claire York! The next episode follows on Frid…

Arnold SMASH!By Sleepy Charlie Media

Pam Pam please!By Sleepy Charlie Media

Arnold basically does an impression of himself, some self mockery. ARRRRRAAAAARRRAAGGGHHH! We laugh, but it’s from pain. He discovers that not only is his wife dead, but the only other person he’s trusted has betrayed him. Batman reveals something, however… she isn’t dead! He’s found her and got her back on ice! SHE LIVES! Maybe there's still hope.…

I beg your pudding? Watch your language!By Sleepy Charlie Media

Capitalist schemes and animal dreams.By Sleepy Charlie Media

We’re back as the city continues to thaw unabated. The most important thing? THE DOG IS ALIVE! YES! GO DOGGO GO! Shake it! “Looks like it’s gonna be a beautiful day”, says Batman... presuming that this plan of his won't just cook people to death in the streets. Wait a Dune Minute! A case like this requires only the finest of investigative minds, so…

Trophies for riddles! Get your trophies here!By Sleepy Charlie Media

On today's investigation, Robin and Batgirl go to hack the computer that controls the satellites... BUT THEY'RE GONNA HAVE TO DO IT UPSIDE DOWN! WWWWwwwwWWWwooooOOOOooOOaaaaaAAAhhhHHHh! Little girls, little boys... what is this, kindergarten? Joining the case is a Bat Minute first timer. We have the queen of comics, of games, of cats and of LIBRARI…

Aaaaayyyyy! The Dark Knight of Kool!By Sleepy Charlie Media

Everybody is falling, going to die… unless Batman can come up with something! Oh, he does? I guess we should have expected that. IT'S GRAPPLIN' TIME! As a telescope explodes for no reason, Bats drops the scientists off to safety before zooming back into the thick of it! Need a ride? Going my way? Joining the investigation is a man who has a price o…

Freeze blows things sky high! Well… uhh… kind of… explodes it a bit. BOMBS AWAY. BATMAN! But do ice bombs melt steel beams? Join the team on our journey through every level of Dante's Inferno! With added telescopes. Back by bodacious demand for one more ninja-tastic crack at the case are Rachel Gatlin and Adam Sheehan of TMNT Minute. GO BATMAN, GO …

Bats asks the scientists if they’re okay and their response doesn’t fill us with much hope really. They don’t SOUND okay! Batman is going to try to save them anyway, damn it. OH WAIT, NO HE ISN’T! To be fair, he's got more important work to do - with mirrors! Back again are Rachel Gatlin and Adam Sheehan of TMNT Minute. This investigation is gonna …

Our swinging scientists call out a dirty fighter! Where's the class? The decorum? Robin goes totally tubular - that is, he takes out the tube... ON BANE! Venom-less or what? It's baggy time. The heat is on for Freeze as Batman raises the temp! Joining this investigation are two totally radical podcasters - we've got Rachel Gatlin and Adam Sheehan o…

Love's Labour's Clueless.By Sleepy Charlie Media

Dead-On Humour and Horror!By Sleepy Charlie Media

We’re back as Batman dangles precariously from the spinning telescope! JUST LIKE A BAT! I guess it's just one of those days. After freeing himself, our Bruce now has to save the scientists too! Can't a (bat)man catch a break? We've got a brawl! A slobberknocker! GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY! Back, back, back again is a crowd favourite - our anatopistic, world…

Check out your dad with the swag on the floor Momma gon' brag when I walk in the door Y'all ain't never seen a guerrilla in the mist Walk the line so fine with a blindfold (uh)By Sleepy Charlie Media

Batman finalises his calibration of the telescope… only to be rudely interrupted. It's just not on! Tonight's forecast though? A FREEZE IS COMING! And it's going to send our heroes a-fallin' and a-tumblin'! Back again as Special Guest Investigator and storyteller extraordinaire is the wondrous fable spinning, magical vocalising, Nightmare Queen her…

Fancy a trim?By Sleepy Charlie Media

Bat-themed heating pods? SIGN ME UP! I'll take ten! Though there’s only eight more minutes until every single Gothamite is an ice cube! Our heroes have a plan. They're going to relay the sunlight from the Congo… via satellite? And mirrors? Okay... Returning from Terra Mirum to once again assist our investigations is the Hufflepunk Queen Bard hersel…

Freeze’s goon leaps from his now icebound machine and seeks freedom. But there is no freedom. Not… from The Bat. Just ask Johnny Gobs! Victor sends Bane to take out Robin and Batgirl, but he himself wants Batman AND he wants to finish the city off. You’re taking on too much, man - delegate! Then again, maybe this snowman melted. Returning for one l…

Our heroic gang rocket into action on their sexy new rides... BUT THERE'S ONLY ELEVEN MINUTES LEFT! You know what would be terrible right about now? If Freeze's super tank arrived on the scene. Oh, about that... Regardless, Batgirl springs into action. She's on the scene now and nobody can stop her. SHE'S FLIPTASTIC! Back on the scene and turning t…

We’re back as… well… Freeze, FREEZES! The city that is! Even the the doggos are no longer safe from his icy touch. What’s this? A new toy… sorry… vehicle arrives on the scene. Make that TWO! MAKE THAT THREE! Stop - BATHAMMER TIME! A veteran has re-joined the fray! The keeper of all of knowledge specifically pertaining to the year 1995 is here - it'…

We meet a lot of people, we drink lots of stuff and have lots of fun...

Batgirl introduces herself to the team... but it's apparently totally un-PC! I'm not sure you really 'get' this, Bats, but okay. Wait a second - IT'S BARBARA IN THERE?!?!? Who could have guessed, eh? Cut to… THE FROZEN OBSERVATORY! I wonder where Mr Freeze could be hiding… Returning for one last crack at this case is Weird Al's favourite burlesque …

Robin struggles underwater and Batman struggles in the sky, both entangled in vines. It's like poetry, it rhymes! “As I told Lady Freeze when I pulled her plug, this is a one woman show”. DON’T REVEAL THIS! What if he’s listening somehow? What if he’s arrived back? WHAT IF THEY TELL HIM? CURSES! Back on the case is she who speaks easily - it's the …

One Clueless Goth...

Ivy swans off having KILLED ROBIN! NNNNOOOOO! But Batman stops her! He’s here to save his… friend? Brother? Son? She can't be doing with this, however - after all, there's so many people to KILL, so little time. How dare she use her feminine wiles?!?!? Joining the investigation is the queen of the eighties herself! Terrible movies? Burlesque? Weird…

I am no (Charlie's) Angel!By Sleepy Charlie Media

May the best moves win... again... for some reason.By Sleepy Charlie Media