Episode 83: Relationship Ambiguity, Protection Mechanisms, and Getting your Guy to Show Up in the Relationship with Traver Boehm


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By Dr. Cat Meyer. Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio is streamed directly from their servers. Hit the Subscribe button to track updates in Player FM, or paste the feed URL into other podcast apps.

Have you ever been in the situation where you are stuck in the question of “do I stay in this relationship or do breakup” only to stay frozen in this place avoiding any decision until circumstances choose for you? Yep. Been there. Not fun. In this episode, Traver Boehm gives us a candid conversation about how relationship ambiguity is the death of intimacy + how to make the shift to lean in + transform yourself + future relationship patterns.

In this episode you will hear:

  • How relationship ambiguity kills intimacy + best practices to navigate the question
  • Strategies we engage in to protect ourselves from deepening in intimacy
  • Traver + Dr Cat’s personal experiences around relationship ambiguity + the lessons they’ve learned
  • Factors to consider when making the decision to stay or breakup
  • As a partner who is the receiver of the ambiguity, what are best practices for care + communication
  • How to get unstuck from the “I’m the only one fighting for this relationship” + how we can shift the polarity again
  • The paradox of choice + how this can cause people to end up avoiding the choice to lean in to the relationship

Traver Boehm even answers some of our audience questions:

  • How to get your man back after you’ve hurt him
  • Do I stay with an amazing woman even though it feels like something is missing?
  • How to get your partner to talk about the issues.


Traver Boehm is the author of Today I Rise, and Man UNcivilized. He’s a two time TEDx speaker, men’s coach and the founder of the UNcivilized Men’s Movement. This movement is radically redefining the way men around the globe experience their masculinity by uniquely blending both primal elements of manhood with massive doses of consciousness.

Drawing upon an eclectic background ranging from professional bodyguarding and Mixed Martial Arts to Traditional Chinese Medicine and meditation, Traver also teaches people to skillfully use the inevitable pain of their lives as fuel for growth and positive change.

Connect with him + find his books at www.manuncivilized.com/thebook + be sure to follow him on instagram @traverboehm

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86 episodes