149: Nice Girls Don't Speak Up or Stand Out: How to Make Your Voice Heard, Your Point Known, and Your Presence Felt


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By Molly McGrath. Discovered by Player FM and our community — copyright is owned by the publisher, not Player FM, and audio is streamed directly from their servers. Hit the Subscribe button to track updates in Player FM, or paste the feed URL into other podcast apps.
Dr. Lois Frankel is the President of Corporate Coaching International, the author of the best-selling book “Nice Girls Don’t Speak Up or Stand Out”, among other books. She’s also an internationally-recognized expert in the field of leadership development for women. Lois sits down with host Molly McGrath to talk about ways women can communicate in the office with their boss and other co-workers..


  • Have people tell you about their upbringing. From that you can tell someone what they need to develop in order to best compliment their behaviors.
  • Nice girls are women who act according to how they were raised from their childhood.
  • Being nice is necessary for success, but it's not the only thing that can bring you success. Hard work comes with that as well.
  • There are different rules for how different are supposed to communicate and those rules keep women from speaking up, which is unfair and unjust.
  • You can’t tell women not to get emotional. Before you get emotional or find yourself in tears, you need to deliver a message. It’s been socially acceptable to be teary but not to be angry.
  • Chance favors the prepared mind. You want to make sure that you are ready for whatever meeting you are going into and odds are that the meeting will go well.
  • If no one is responding to you, don’t keep talking as people tend to tune out. Instead, use a tagline like “did I answer your question?”

Quote of the Show:

7:35 “Nice is necessary for success, it’s simply not sufficient.”


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