Grieving Well with Suzanne Stabile


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The first of five muscles the church needs to strengthen in order to be fit, agile, and ready for God’s now is Grieving Well. Suzanne Stabile is well known as an expert on the Enneagram. This past year, she has done extensive work on grief and the Enneagram because she believes grieving in real time is so important in our world today. Suzanne offers us remarkable insights through this in-depth interview about grief and what grieving well looks like for congregations and communities.

Suzanne Stabile is a highly sought after speaker and teacher, known for her engaging laugh, personal vulnerability and creative approach to Enneagram instruction. After 25 years of studying the enneagram, learning from people’s stories, cultivating relationships, and learning under Father Richard Rohr, she has become a bestselling author and world class teacher of the enneagram and how individuals can best utilize this spiritual tool.


  • “But what has happened to me as I’ve started to work on grieving is that I’ve come to believe that we have to grieve through the transition in order to live into the teaching that life has merely changed.” -Suzanne Stabile [17:23]
  • “Grieving has got to be as unique to the individual as anything that’s ever gonna happen.” -Suzanne Stabile [25:59]


  • [00:01] Intro
  • [01:28] Meet Suzanne
  • [04:11] The hosts’ thoughts on the conversation
  • [06:51] Grieving in real time
  • [12:59] How the enneagram can inform how to grieve
  • [16:01] What has happened to her as she’s worked on grieving
  • [22:45] Why she decided to study grieving
  • [25:08] Grieving has to be as unique to the individual
  • [27:42] What it would look like for congregations to do grief well together
  • [33:12] Two kinds of ambiguous loss
  • [37:05] Grief, fear and despair are basic emotions
  • [45:11] Outro


Suzanne’s newest book is “The Journey Toward Wholeness: Enneagram Wisdom for Stress, Balance, and Transformation” released on November 2, 2021. Her other books include “The Road Back to You” and “The Path Between Us.” Find out more about Suzanne’s ministry and workshop opportunities on her Life in the Trinity website: and at:

Suzanne’s podcast is “The Enneagram Journey”:

The two books Suzanne references in the podcast are: Ambiguous Loss by Pauline Boss and Healing through the Dark Emotions by Miriam Greenspan

“God Has Work for Us To Do” music and lyrics by Mark Miller. Visit Mark’s website at or find him on YouTube at

This podcast is brought to you by the Leadership Ministry team at TMF and Wesleyan Investive. Leadership Ministry connects diverse, high capacity leaders in conversations and environments that create a network of courage, learning, and innovation in order to help the church lean into its God-appointed mission. For more information and to support Leadership Ministry, visit

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